I have just had an epiphany of wow proportions I think?
I posted on my personal blog this morning the following post:
I think this is a major factor as to why I could not be an effective guild leader in the eyes of some people.
My real life job is about managing relationships, making people happy to use the service my company provides. It is about dealing with over 30 specific people with different personalities and goals and somehow managing to always keep them happy to come back to us.
I used this in my guild leadership methods. If people were unhappy I wanted to know why so I could investigate and correct if needed. I thought my efforts would be appreciated by people. I enjoyed having some part of the control of a guild where I could affect change when needed to ensure said happiness did occur.
Over the time as a guild leader, a few people made it quite difficult for me to do as the basic message was that you can’t make everyone happy. To a degree I agree with this statement, but as my job entails doing exactly that I was not understanding why it would not translate into the game. The point being that some people will never be happy and will always attack and belittle the people trying to make the experience good for them.
I was devastated when i left my old guild as I had believed I was making a group of people work together and put aside their differences. Obviously, they are all still together and happy so I was not a factor in that. This makes me sad to realise that not only in my gaming life, but in my personal life I am just not good at managing relationships.
Yes it was just one negative email, over the hundreds of positive ones I have received, but the negative was so very negative to me, and about my abilities and efforts.
This morning has made me realise that no matter how much you think you are making a difference or doing something good for a group of people, they will inevitably attack you on a personal level with no thought for how it affects you; emotionally or psychologically.
So in the end I suck as a guild leader because I was trying to use my tactics and methods of managing relationships at work, with my guild members in game. I was treating them as people we wanted to keep in the guild, people I wanted to stay on and be loyal and be happy with their time spent. I was a dickhead for thinking this was possible.
Treat em mean, keep em keen.